So I finally went to a therapist.

So I finally went to a therapist.
She told me what I already knew... PTSD, anxiety, depression, ADHD.. it's the PTSD that I have the biggest issue with. Because i get reminded and triggered almost daily. Normally it's small triggers that I can just push to the back of my mind but something happened recently that just made me relive the whole situation in detail and now ever since I can't stop thinking about it. I really wonder that if I had support from literally anyone when I got raped if I wouldn't have had as many issues now.. I am so bitter. I'm bitter to everyone. Everyone who still hangs out with him. Everyone who has had my name in there mouth saying I lied. Bitter that he's living his best life. Bitter that he took my virginity. Bitter that noone fucking believed me. Bitter that now I'm on 6 different meds but I was perfectly okay before this shit. Bitter that even after sooo many years I still think about that night. I'm so fucking bitter. It would of been so much easier to just ignore what happened and lied and said that "it was consensual because we were dating" but that would of been a lie. I didn't even want everyone to know. I told one "friend" the truth and then the whole school heard about it. To my surprise, not one person cared lmao. I'm an adult now... None of this should matter to me anymore...but it does no matter how hard I try to forget it and leave it in the past.. I just can't.
PTSD is hard. It drains me every day.

-TDP