The Social Norm

The bags under my eyes tell a story of pain. I’m tired of holding back what’s going on in my life and I think many others need to listen if they feel this way too. I look at my life and try to grab all the happiest moments and compare it to other by saying “well atleast I got to enjoy this” or “atleast I have this.” But … my pain is my pain. It’s how I’m feeling. It’s not to be compared to other peoples life’s anymore. I am numb. I want to cry. I want to cry and feel like it’s okay to just be sad. It’s okay to not want to hang out in the real world because you really can’t communicate like you used to. You don’t feel brave anymore. But that’s okay because you’re still running somehow.. even if it’s running away. It’s hard to constantly “stay strong.” It’s harder to stay strong when you’re falling down a rabbit hole and the sticks you grab on in hopes of it saving you only break.   I’m not me anymore and no one sees that . I want to be alone but I know that the loneliness is only making me used to it.  So much is going on in my life and has always gone on in my life, I am cracking. I need to let everything out. My writings go on and on but no one that I know would ever know I feel this way.. except me. I can’t open up to society because of society.

-TDP